Amy, her Miracle Baby and the Shower

My nurse friend Amy is having a baby. I will not go into the personal gynecological details but she did everything to conceive, using the best the medical science has to offer to no avail. Well, God prevailed and she is approaching the birth of Samuel the beginning of May. She is a small individual by stature and looks like she is carrying a Clydesdale. Being the totally compassionate person I will just say this: better her than me. We are having a shower for her today at 2pm at my house. I volunteered several months ago to host the shindig and since my home is half way between her home town and where the rest of her friends reside my offer was accepted. I really wasn't thinking much about it because all I had to do was provide the house and make sangria and her favorite, banana punch. I am not much of a housekeeper. That is the understatement of the year. I actually am NO housekeeper. I don't know why that domestic gene skipped past me but it did and I end up in a panic when I think I am going to have company. My friends accept that when they come over there will be a few dishes in the sink, laundry on the floor of the laundry room and my bed unmade. I have other qualities and given enough time might be able to list them but I digress. I was in a panic and decided to hire a housekeeper last week. She was to come Tuesday this week and Thursday. Well Tuesday she got lost and came late. I apparently did not have enough cleaning supplies(any) and she gave me a list to buy before she came back. Stan and I went to Target and I found myself in the cleaning aisle looking at all the neat things they have for making your abode shine. Stan laughed and said he wished he had a camera to preserve the moment seeing as how I usually run thru that area of the store. I bought all the items requested and sat them on the counter awaiting the cleaning lady. Thursday she called to say that her husband had been arrested and her car impounded. Do I have good luck or what? So I started in myself. I spent two hours in my bedroom dusting and sweeping. Do you have any idea how dusty the top blades of the ceiling fan can get? It's flipping amazing! I threw away things that I didn't want or need ending up with 3 huge trash bags of stuff for the garbage. I did laundry and worked on the kitchen. Becky came over Friday and did the bathrooms from top to bottom while I worked on the sangria and banana punch and decorated the dining room after scrubbing the floor. We decorated the 2 deer hanging in my hallway. They are pretty cute, they have baby hats on and large blue baby bottles hung around their necks. We tied bibs on each of their little deer necks. The carpets had been cleaned on Thursday so all in all the house looked better. I love to have my house clean I just don't have the time or energy to keep it up. The other hostesses are bringing all sorts of food. Cake too. YUM. I am just assuming that shower cake is as good as birthday and wedding cake. Other than cake I just want some sangria. I made what amounts to about 8 liters of the stuff. I used red wine, brandy, fruits, sugar and a cinnamon stick then before you serve it you top it off with just a little 7-up. YUMMM. I really wish my camera was working so that I could save pictures of the party and the house. I could hang pictures on my cleaning supply cupboard to encourage me to clean.. sort of like posting a picture of me in my bikini (when I was 26) on my refrigerator so that I won't want to break my diet. It doesn't always work but it's a thought. If I can manage to find a camera I will post some pictures.

Stimulation or I Am Really Pithed

Remember college anatomy and physiology when you had to dissect the frog? You had to select the frog then you had to have the frog "pithed". Pithing is when you sever the spinal cord up by the little frog neck. That little procedure rendered the frog paralyzed but still alive, unable to move or help itself in any way. Then you placed the pithed frog on its belly and applied an electrical shock to its legs and made it hop due to the exchange of sodium and ummmm... something else. Hey it's been 35 years since I have been in that damn class so give me a break.

As I was driving to work I had an AH-HA moment and drew a modern day analogy to the pithed frog. We the American tax paying public are the pithed frog. The Obama stimulus package is the electrical shock. As long as we keep getting the shock we will hop but when it stops we are on our stomachs in a world of hurt. What happens next is the frog(us) is pinned to a mat and eviscerated by the student(congress)all in the name of forwarding scientific study(socialism). By the way it has been debated whether the frog feels anything. I think we are being numbed by rhetoric and fear to the point of being paralyzed just like that frog. By inaction we are allowing congress to pin us to the mat and gut us financially. Okay you frogs don't get pithed get back in the pond and take charge of your lilly pad

A Mom Memory

This early morning I was caring for an Alzheimer's patient and listening to her talk about her children. She was telling about how her job was never done and she just had to keep watch over her children. I flashed back to the last time I had stayed with my mom in her little apartment. I was sleeping on the fold out sofa and in the middle of the night I awoke to her stroking my hair from my face. I asked her if something was wrong and her answer was that she was just checking on me to make sure I was all right. She bent over and kissed me goodnight and went back to bed. I miss that touch.

Attack of the Fat

My mirror was most cruel today. I put on my scrub top to go to work and noted that my upper arm fat sorta hung down over my elbow...just a little....well maybe more than just a little. I did the dumbest thing. I undressed and looked at myself from all angles. I previously blogged that your mirror will lie to you and it's true until the age of 57 when apparently the scales fall away and you see yourself. I have cankles(where your calf meets your fat ankles) and I have a abdomo-thigh(where your abdomen meets your thighs...standing up) and last but not least my thighs are starting to overlap my knees. The only thing that doesn't droop is my boobs because they are fake. My implants(due to cancer)have gotten smaller in relation to my belly getting bigger. I am really disgusted with myself. I still remember my size 10 string bikini. I remember being able to dance,and do so wildly I might add, in 3 inch heels. My center of gravity is so off that with 3 inch heels I will pitch forward on my face. I can't cross my legs and I can't paint my own toenails. Wiping my butt is becoming a creative endeavor that even I can't discuss here. Okay today is the day. I start back on sugar busters today. Maybe I have just embarrassed myself(I am not sure that is possible)by admitting all the above but I swear to my 4 faithful readers that I am going to do it... I am going to diet and will report here my success and or failure. At the end when, Lord help me, I have successfully shed what amounts to 400 sticks of butter I will post before and after shots..... won't that be a treat!!!! Keep me in your thoughts.

A Rebekah Memory

I recommend all mothers make a note to blog (or journal) when their kids are small so that memories can be preserved. In an effort to let my grand kids know what their parents were like when a memory resurfaces I am blogging it down.

My daughter was a precious angel as a toddler. She had many ear infections and thus didn't talk much till about the age of two to three. One day we heard her out in the back yard talking to the boy across the fence. I can still see the blue gingham dress she had on with her curly white blond hair trailing down her back. She had her hands on her hips and she was reciting every curse word she ever heard, said in toddler-speak: some-a-bitch, 'dannit', shit, poopyhead, and a few others that I cannot write down in fear of the blogging police. I PROMISE you she didn't hear those words at home. Stan brought her in the house to the hall bath and soaped his fingers to wash out her mouth. He told her he had to wash out the bad words and to open up. She opened up and he liberally 'scrubbed' the words out of her mouth. She was not happy and cried real tears and was sent to her room. Nothing more was said and the rest of the day was uneventful. That night as she got ready for bed she knelt down on her knees to pray. After God blessing each of the animals on her wallpaper(her room was done in Woodland Friends paper) She got very serious and said God don' you let Jesus ebber say shithead, some-a bitch, or dannit cause you have to wash he mowf out wif soap. Amen.
My little angel.

At a Loss For Words

To those of you who know me the title of this blog would never describe me. In the past few weeks I have been watching in morbid fascination what is happening to our country. The news now is like coming up on a train wreck, horrible to see, but you can't take your eyes away. I keep thinking I need to watch reruns to get myself in mind numbing state of unawareness. First of all I liked Bush, a lot. I believe he kept us safe. Even then, I was not happy with Bush with the first bailout and let my representatives know that, which as responsible voting Americans we are supposed to do. Now, Obama has forced thru a 'stimulus package' that will keep our country in debt for generations. I have a huge problem with being force fed anything and 1000 + page tome explaining where our money is going that was delivered just days before the vote was to take place smacks of being force fed a pile of crap. I quote my mom a lot in my blog but something she used to say is fitting here. Don't sign anything that you have not read. This makes sense in every situation and anyone who insists that you sign ANYTHING before you have had a chance to read it is selling you a bill of goods. We are living in scary times and our charismatic president is not helping. He is fanning the flames of fear and forcing this stimulation package down our throats before anyone has had the opportunity to read it. It could be the best thing since sliced bread but NO ONE should have signed it without a full disclosure and without Americans being able to have their say thru their elected representatives. I sent off the obvious e-mails to my "people' and told them I would be unhappy if they signed or words to that effect. I strongly feel that this is going to be one of the worst things that has happened to our country and if it turns out that I am wrong then you will read it here first.... I will give a big 'my bad'... eat crow and all that. Time will tell.

China Imports and Obama Antimama

Coming to work tonight I heard on the news that we have a ton of expensive homes built with drywall from China that is now making people sick. They have traced this to homes built after 2005 till 2007 when we were unable to keep up with demand post hurricanes. Apparently this is mostly in southern Florida and the builders started bringing this crap in from China. Two things come to mind. Number one is: good things come to those that wait. The good things being non-contaminated supplies made in the USA. Number two thing is the absolute scary learning curve demonstrated by the Government officials in charge of protecting us and the lack of memory that we ourselves demonstrate when we purchase things made in China. HELLO doesn't anyone recall our poisoned dogs and cats or how about toys made for our kids with lead based materials, or better yet tainted medication... just to name the three that really stuck in my mind. We have problems of our own in America with contaminated food etc. without importing this crap. Crawfish are a mainstay down in this area. We have local crawfish farmers who stock our stores and we have Chinese crawfish being imported at a greatly reduced price. I am here to tell you that I will never, EVER buy imported crawfish from China.. my mom didn't raise no dummy. It is not surprising the number of people here that prefer to buy the more expensive locally raised crawfish vs. the Chinese import. I guess Louisiana folk are smarter than the average Government official at least when it comes to crawfish. Stan was upset greatly while shopping at Christmas when almost everything traditional to the holiday was made in China. While we waited in line we heard people buying Chinese imports discussing how bad our economy was and the loss of jobs! I now look at all products that I purchase and I try to buy exclusively from the USA and not out of country. But that's just me.

Obama I had hopes for you and then you shot me down within the first week by reversing the ban on giving federal money to international groups that perform abortions. And being the shy retiring man that you are you did it with little to no fanfare.... or were you hoping to slide that one by us? Now I realize that it is a hot political topic and that the ban on the bill was like a boil on the collective liberal ass. They whined that the ban denied U.S. aid to the worlds poor by refusing to fund those groups sponsoring abortions. Those same groups also deal with family planing and HIV/AIDS. That is probably truth. It's simple, to get our money just knock out the abortion clause. Anyway, I have a lot of misgivings about sending money into countries that hate us anyway and I don't think that we should have to contribute money to support a policy that we personally don't agree with. My mom always said that you can't buy your friends because those friends will be able to be bought by someone else with more money. Before I read comments about what a selfish individual I am, let me state that I whole heartedly agree with family planning and global research on HIV/AIDS. Over the years I have changed my mind about abortion. I am not a rabid right-to-lifer(for instance I agree with giving treatment to prevent pregnancies after rapes) but the rabid pro choicers are, well words don't express how I feel about them..... but to use abortion for birth control and/or population control is an abomination. Have we become so jaded that we have lost the alarms of our consciousness?