Camping

A few of my work friends got a wild hair and decided that it would be fun to go camping in a month or so. Faye asked me to be part of that group. While I was THRILLED to be included I just ASSUMED that we would be going to a lodge. She looked at me like I had a second head and said no we are using tents. Let me mention a few things about Louisiana that may make me shudder when I think of the great outdoors. Think large spiders, snakes, mosquitoes, humidity, and out houses. First off I have to pee 3 times a night. I have trouble getting out of bed, I'm so stiff. Can you picture me trying to get up off the ground, getting a flashlight and running to the Porta-potty? I have a 58 year old bladder. I would wee-wee all over myself. My idea of camping out is a 3 star hotel. Roughing it means I have to go clear down the hall for the ice maker. Survival camping is no room service. I admit I am spoiled but to willingly subject myself to the Louisiana humidity is just plain crazy plus I am very fond of the sound of a flushing toilet. I found out that Denise, the inpatient nurse was just as against the tent idea as I was thank God. It takes hair gel, curling iron and hairspray to make myself presentable. I would have to have a generator attached to my tent to make a go of roughing it. NO THANKS. Faye succumbed to the pressure and found a cabin in the woods that sleeps eight. I think it only has one bathroom and that is pretty primitive but doable. It may be fun, just the girls communing with nature and greeting the dawn with a Bloody Mary!

Heavy Heart

Dear God,
You know what is on my heart. This situation seems more than I can bear. Please hear this prayer and deliver a miracle. I don't know the solution. I know what I want but that may not be the best solution so I am asking that you will intervene and deal with this problem in such a way that there will be no doubt that the answer came from Your hand. I bind in Jesus name the spirit of confusion, anger, fear and depression. I bind in Jesus name the voice of Satan that can sound so much like Yours in the mind of Your child who needs your protection. I pray for peace and calm, I pray for Your voice to be the only one heard and the one listened to. I pray that Your love and angels will surround Your child and restore all that has been taken, given away or lost. It is at the point that You only can deal with this. All other avenues seem blocked so I am praying that You will open the door and let Your light shine in and burn away that which should not be there. I am praying for protection and deliverance. In writing this I am praying that You ease my heart as well. In Jesus name.

Tax Day and Thelma's Birthday

I was just on facebook and read an entry from Angela Jacob It said "happy income distribution day" to which I added a comment that it gave me a warm and fuzzy feeling to give my income to those who MOST expect it. I get livid when I am at work and come across those who EXPECT to be cared for and have no incentive or drive to take care of themselves..as evidenced by my last blog entry. I really have trouble at times being compassionate to idiots who are inappropriately using the ER with my tax dollars. The old adage the only sure thing in life is death and taxes needs updated with the recent government additions to the budget. It should now read the only sure thing in life is death by taxes. I am still support an overall tax on consumer goods and do away with the income tax. That way we all(including the entitled ones) pay the same amount of taxes based on our expenditures plus we could pretty much say buh-bye to the IRS.

The other thing April 15 celebrates is my Mother-in-law Thelma's birthday. Thelma, Happy, Happy 85th birthday. I wonder what you dreamed of when you thought of a wife for your only son. It probably wasn't me in my outspoken often overweight glory. I can't even keep house. But we have learned about each other and I believe to appreciate our different ways of looking at life. I am putting together a family photo book for my kids. I have been working on this project for about 10 years but not diligently. Every year I swear it will be done for Christmas. Thelma and I spent several hours together while she told me stories about her family so that Becky would have a greater knowledge about her own history. Listening to her gave me a greater understanding of the 'stuff' she was made of. Thelma is mother to Elaine and Stanley, grandmother to Rebekah, Joshua, Lance, Kyle, Gavin, and Trevor, great-grandmother to Morgan, Cameron, Chase, Claire and Graham. She is a formidable woman who values family above all. I can still see the look on her face when she saw her granddaughter Rebekah for the first time. She had tears in her eyes as she pronounced her beautiful. You are a friend and I value and love you. Happy Birthday

UGGGGGHHHH..

Okay this is going to be a short blog and unfortunately will not be read by the people that need to read it. The reason for this is that I believe that most of the people that read my blog(that I know of) are reasonably intelligent. DO NOT COME TO THE ER FOR SOMETHING MINOR WITHOUT TRYING TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF FIRST. I got accused of having an ATTITUDE( me can you believe that!!!???!!!) because I questioned a woman who complained of a sore throat for 7 days with 10 out of 10 pain(1 is no pain and 10 is the worst pain you have ever had) I asked her what she had taken for the pain. She told me nothing. I looked at her and said "for the past 7 days you have had the worst pain in your life and you have not taken even a Tylenol?"
Her: It don't work.
Me: It's important to try to relieve your discomfort at home first"
Her: Well you know what, I don't like your at-ti-tude. I come here to get something for my pain not get a lecture from you.
Me: I am sorry for what you have perceived as my poor attitude but I would not be doing my job if I didn't try to help you understand that you need to help yourself when you are hurting"
Her: I want another nurse. I don't need you to tell me what to do".

As it turned out she had a cavity. Her throat was fine. Also to the other 'gem' of the night you can try to fake the shakes but remember that the door has a window and we can see you when we walk by. When the only time you shake and quake is when your family or our staff come in then you are a very poor actress.... just like the last 4 times you have come in to see us. It works on your family each time but we had your number the second time you came in.

Reap What Ye Sow Or Gather the Crops They's Withern'

Last fall I regaled you all on the glories of the game Mobsters. Well I got news for you Mobsters is so out and FARMVILLE is so in. I love my farm and it is stupidly addicting. You plant, you adopt animals, you build pens, you take care of your neighbors, you harvest your plants and you earn money. You can plant all kinds of things with growing times of 4 hours to 4 days. The more days the bigger the payoff in pretend money. I was up to 1.2 million dollars(I'm a great farmer) and got an offer to buy a sheepdog for 300 thousand dollars. What a BARGAIN. Now the deal is that the 300 thousand dollar dog has to be fed every 24 hours with kibble that is either gifted to you or you buy with farm bucks OR the sucker runs away. You only have to feed him till he grows up...for one to two weeks... I can't remember how long and it's not important to the story anyhow. If he runs away you have to buy him back with farm bucks. Well I was up at 3 am the other morning and bought the dog. I didn't even think to really plan this out because I was coming up on my 4 nights on. It hit me at work at 1am that my 300 thousand dollar dog was going to take off because I can't get FB at work and couldn't feed him his kibble. I drove home at 7am, and ran in the house, hooked up the laptop and my dog is still there! He was however hungry. I fed him and he rolled over and little hearts appeared over his head. Is that precious or what? I am fortunate that I am not alone in my mania over Farmville. I have 40 plus neighbors from all walks of life.. several of them are related to me... and all seem to spend a lot of time 'farming'. Well if you all are on facebook come visit me at the old homestead.. you can join and be my neighbor...yeehaw!!!!!!

Happy 33rd Birthday Joshua

I love you unconditionally. I pray that God will give you wisdom, clairity, and peace. I want all the good things for you in life but know that in order for those things to have value that you must get them for yourself. I will always be your biggest fan.

Love, Mom

Fashion and the ER

I saw a woman last night who was one of the following: a) the most secure person I ever met b) blind c) in danger of being put away for a life sentence by the fashion police. This lovely(and I use that term loosely) young lady had black hair topped off with an added Mohawk hairpiece in hot pink, purple and a lighter shade that honest to God I can't remember I was in such shock. She was large(again the term used very very loosely) dressed in a puffy dress that had elastic around the very short hem that made the dress puff out in the middle and it made it sort of egg shaped. The dress was very low cut and she had bounteous ta-tas that were encased in something that pushed them up and out. She had to be a DDDDD cup. Words cannot describe her cleavage. The ta-tas jiggled. A lot. She had an abundance of gold jewelry everywhere and a cute little gold thing in her nose. The gold thing matched the gold in her front teeth. The gold in her front teeth had some sort of design that I really wanted to look at more closely but didn't have a good excuse to do so. I was speechless....ME speechless... go figure. Damn the privacy laws!!! I so wanted to take her picture with my phone. I stopped dead with my mouth open when I first saw her and then had to do a song and dance to prevent her being 'insulted'. It was like seeing an accident.. so awful that you just have to stare. I had to avert my gaze because she could have thrown me down and stomped on me if she perceived me as looking at her in less than an admiring way. OH oh oh oh... the nails...long and multi-colored AND matched her toenails that were on a pair of wide feet that were crammed into 3 inch wedged heels. I didn't get to see the underwear(God be praised) but my bet is on a size 28 thong. I am still in shock.