Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Tiger

I have had it with ALL the news channels including my very very favorite Fox. I don't want to hear another thing about Tiger Woods or his problems. Let the man alone and deal with his family privately. We have no business with our noses in his affairs... maybe that was a poor choice of words. My feeling is that Tiger is an athlete, he doesn't make foreign policy. You understand what I am trying to say? I have a vested interest in who is getting boinked in the White House or what transgressions are committed by those idiots who represent us. I pay them. I vote for them. I expect them to behave a certain way and if they don't then they need to tell me why. Tiger is a golfer. He makes a lot of money. Good for him. His lack of self control doesn't raise my taxes or cause me any hardship. I don't know why he chose to wander around like a tom cat and further more I just don't care. If I played golf... which thank God I have the good sense not to do....I don't think the fact that he was indiscreet, got into a fight with his wife, and had an accident, would affect my game one way or the other.

Some advice Tiger if I so may offer:
You don't like what you have at home??? Learn to like her. You liked her well enough at least twice that I can see. Something else, you are incredibly stupid for such a successful young man. You really think some bimbo who is willing to sleep with you, knowing that you are married, doesn't really have dollar signs in her eyes? It's not that you aren't just the cutest thing because you are and you know it....But really, she and whoever else you wandered with had two things in mind. 1) maybe he will marry me and then I can get all the attention and money and 2) if he doesn't marry me then I can sell my dozens of text messages to the highest bidder. You walked into that with your eyes open and that is just plain stupid. And Lord Almighty.... the phone message asking the bimbo to change her message because your wife was checking out your phone. You should have just 'fessed up and told your wife what was going on and then took your punishment like a man.

To the women in his life(except his wife)
You are money grubbing, pond scum sucking bottom feeders. You knew he was married and you took the ride anyway. Down in the south here we have a cute little name for opportunistic women like you... sluts... bless your little hearts.

To his wife.
Elin, I don't want to know what your problems are but if you love him then get into counseling. People do stupid things all the time and deserve to be forgiven. It will take time but if the love is there then you both can make it work. If he does it again let me offer some advice: Years ago a woman presented into the ER accompanying her husband who was on an ambulance stretcher. She was whacking him about the arms and head, much to the amusement of the paramedics. The whole way in she was yelling at him to "tell the people, go on you !#$%&*!+, tell the people just what you did to me." He was a rutting dog and she had had her fill. She got him loaded one night and while he snored in his alcohol induced sleep she glued his man parts together. Specifically she took superglue and stretched his penis up as far as it would go and glued it to his stomach. She glued each of his testicles to each other and to the sides of his legs. When she did this his legs were drawn up in the fetal position so that it would be painful if he tried to straighten his legs out. Then she slapped the living shit out of him to wake him up. I don't know who called the ambulance but isn't that the most precious little story!!!

1 comment:

Yvette Burleigh said...

Hmmmm... interesting to say the least. LOL!